Inside Job vs. Outside Job + Epic...Disaster!

Scenario: This past weekend did a bike/run brick w/ Stiney on Sat. We biked about 16 miles and averaged about 21 mph and then ran 2 miles. Pulled something in back doing airplane w/ baby.

Had to run 13 miles on Sunday. And the story begins here...

So I am headed off to run my 13. I am exhausted and not looking forward to the run. It is easily 90 + degrees outside and the humidity was fierce. In the car on the way to the lake, I call my buddies for some "external motivation". They were in a different mood (headed to a party) and were unable to be of any real assistance to the cause. So I get out of the car and continue my quest on the trail. Pearl Jam's "Inside Job" hit me at the right time on my Mp3 Player and I began to get really motivated...I knew that my effort today would have to come from inside. So I said to myself, "let's push it, let's experiment with some pacing and test some limits". That was all I needed--at the moment. I was running like a dog fresh off the leash at the dog park!

About mile 4, I started to feel the heat and my inner canine was wanting to jump in Salem Lake and call it a day. I was thinking about church that morning and the sermon being about looking for the "burning bushes" that represent God's presence that are around us all the time...then all of sudden---I started to feel these cool breezes coming off the lake and I was able to continue. My sense of strength and motivation then became an outside job...external to myself.

The ying and yang continued. At mile 8, I was hot and hurting and could not get my heart rate down. Tom Petty's "don't fade on me" came on and I kept repeating that phrase as my mantra to myself...as if "Body, don't fade on me". It was an inside job then. About mile 11, a light and cool rain began...not a second too soon as my water supply was depleted and I had forgotten my second gu in the car. The rain cooled me off and distracted me from my inside job...was the rain a "burning bush" as well...? I eventually finished the run. It was not pretty. It was ugly. It hurt worse than it should. But I pushed it and learned some limits...hopefully expanded my capacity.
Perhaps, if I am able to challenge my male "dichotomy" thinking then I come to the conclusion that it does not have to be "either" or "or"..."black" or "white"...I think it was an inside and an outside job that got me to the finish line. Perhaps I don't even know which one was which!

Well to top off the story...which brings me to the disaster...I drank my endorox and headed home. Only to find myself shivering and cramping. I was unable to keep any food or liquid down for the entire evening...

Ha--everything inside....came outside....

...and the journey continues!

2008: The Year of "Real" Endurance

This year has been the year of 26.2's and perhaps the most all-encompassing endurance race of them all: having a child!

I have often thought someone could have written me a book that tells me minute by minute what it would be like to have a child...and the book would not have conveyed 5% of what it is really like to have a child. This year's quest has revealed to me new responsibilities (3:00 am feedings, diaper genie knots), new possibilities ("can I really push the stroller up this hill?", a few hours of sleep can be enough?), new strengths("I can do this parent-thing"), new vuneralbilities (times of a whole new dimension of helplessness) and a new gusto...for the journey!

Next goal: Mission Sub-4:00 OBX (aka Outerbanks Marathon, Nov. 9th).

My goal is to run the marathon in less than 4 hours. I think I can get 3:45 ...

I did 7 miles at apprx. a 9:05 pace w/ a 2 minute walking/goo break today.

Avg. heart rate was 155. I felt good and could have pushed it harder. My legs are coming off of an epic 30 mile "attack ride" yesterday in which Stiney-Hiney wished he had more impulse control!

Overall and possibly most difficult goal of quest: Balance.
The art of priority management. How to keep family, marriage, fatherhood, athletics, mental health, occupation, spiritual and environmental duties dovetailed with Ironman aspirations?
I am open to sugestions.

I am hopeful that I can achieve this elusive goal.

I will find a way...

The Journey: "Hey, at least I finished right?..."

So, save for some 21 minute and change 5k results in which I won some age groups...oh yea and a 2nd place Clydesdale triathlon finish ( I don't care if the swim times were off Nate)...my results over the last 4 years have been nothing special! My rationalization to sleep better at night has always been "hey, at least I finished!"

Truth is, even though "yea, I want to do well", the special thing about this journey has been about the personal growth from my training experiences, the people I have met on the way, and the camaraderie I have gotten by training with my friends. Nate Dogg, B-Nutz, Stiney-Hiney, Chuck-D, and J-Rock have been awesome with their commitment to a lifestyle of fitness and adventure. I am lucky they let me suck wheel on the weekends! And Nate...I will beat you one day...one day! But more about the cheesy stuff later...for myself...for my accountability...here are most of my results over the last 4 years...along with some observations...

Clemson 05/2004: Swim: 750: 16:19/ Bike 11 miles: 38:22/ 5k run: 25:04/ Overall: 1:19:44
(*I felt as if I was going to be kicked to death in the lake, almost drowned, evaded a panic attack)

Hurley 07/2004: S 500: 15:33/ B 12.5 miles: 41:06/ 2.75 miles run: 20:34/ OAll: 1:20:48
(*Several times I said to self: "Self, why do you do this?")

Tour of Tanglewood, 09/2005 My first Century, 100 mile bike ride
(*"There will be food for you at the finish"...yea at Brick Oven Pizza ya dirty liars!)

White Lake Sprint, 05/2007: S 750 20:11/ B 14 miles: 43:41/ 5k: 23:02/ OAll: 1:31:02
(*There were white caps on the surface and Loch Ness below)

Triad Tri, 08/2007: Swim 300 yds: 5:07/ B10 miles: 34:21/ 3.1 trail: 26:34/ OAll: 1:08:47
(*2nd place Clydesdale whoop whoop...yea the race folks messed up the swim...don't burst my bubble!)

Lake Lure, 09/2007: Swim 500 mtrs: 12:33/ B15.5 miles: 1:03:37/ 5k uphill: 29:03/ OAll 1:48:09 (*Kidney stones + mountains = enter the pain cave for a winter spell)

Big Sur International Marathon 04/08: 26.2 miles/ 4:39:56
(*Bonk at 20 miles, consider cliff jumping, Dean Karnazes is on the sauce)

Until next time, in which I will discuss about current barriers and my new adventure!
Zip it up and Zip it out!

The Initiation:

It all started when my brother in-law "to be" was planning on doing the Clemson Sprint Triathlon in 2004. This came at a time when I was wanting to challenge myself before I finished grad school and would have to enter the "real world"(marriage, dog, mortgage). It sounded like a ridiculously tough feat but somehow had an incredible allure to me.

Please keep in mind: as my grandfather says, "son , you are built like an Army mule."
1) I do not have a lean cyclist's body structure and had not ridden since middle school bmx...
2) When I was forced to swim on the swim team in elementary school--well I swam in the "exhibition" lane where it did not really count but they wanted me to feel "part of the team"...
3) I have always hated running--so much that in military school I felt lucky if I passed the 2 mile run on the PT test.
I liked the non-cardio sports: weight-lifting, wrestling...any sport in which I could stop and catch my breath.

Completing a triathlon would take me learning and doing 3 different skills that I was not born for, did not enjoy, and really, really were terrible at doing. My attitude at the time was kind of like the scene in Good Will Hunting when Matt Damon's character is asked why he picked the wrench for his dad to beat him with. He responds with "cause f%*k him, that's why." I guess I started this Quest because I felt the need for some personal growth and I had my own "beatings" to try make sense of..."cause f*$k them, that's why!"

So I picked a training plan off the net, bought an old steel road bike off E-bay with shifters on the down tubes, begged an old friend to teach me how to swim and borrowed my little brother's goggles.

I was off on my Quest.